I probably just said "Why can't he make up his mind." because I know he has made up his mind. He is divorcing me to be with her.
I just don't want to except that it's the truth. I want to believe that he is confused and that he really does love me. Bottom line is he doesn't love anymore. For two years I wasn't myself (after talking to my doctor she doesn't think my hormones ever went back to normal after Felina) 2 WHOLE YEARS. Now that I finally stepped up and got help and am leveling out. . . he's done.
I do still call. But it's just to "update" him. Let him know that I am thinking about him. I don't call him and exploded or beg or cry. But for instance Kiya sat in the walker for a little bit today. . so later when I call I'll tell him about that and just tell him I hope he had a good day and that he's safe etc. If that's wrong then shoot me. I would do it for the rest of my life cause I do love him. This is really hard for me to face. I just I really wanted to have a good weekend with him this time around. . . and he never gives me the chance. It's always about HER.
