As Christian husbands, we're obligated to love our wives as Christ loves the church. It seems to me that while Christian wives ought to be understanding of our sex drives and accommodate us as best they can, we also have an obligation to make them safe and protect them (love "always protects").
That, it seems to me, is a calling to love our wives sacrificially...which means if they find specific desires distasteful, perhaps we have an obligation to sacrifice those things for their happiness and feeling secure in the relationship.
It seems like what we should really want is to do our best for each other. If we're submitting to each other in that way, what could be more satisfying than that?
I'm in a sitch where my W cheated on me and says she has no feelings for me at all, but as a Christian she believes in meeting my sexual needs even though she feels nothing for me right now; likewise, I try to temper my demands out of consideration for her. We clearly do not have an ideal marriage by any stretch of the imagination, but we are working and praying that God will bless our faith in him and in each other and heal our marriage completely.
I'm not judging you, bro. I'm not saying what you might want in the BR is necessarily wrong. But I guess it's kind of like the difference between getting your wife to go to a pro football game with you vs. getting her to go, wear the fright wig, paint her face the team colors, and dress like the mascot.
Maybe for right now you could both agree on weekly frequency and commit to making it the best experience for both of you. After a while, she might be more open to the extras???
You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means. -- Inigo Montoya, 'The Princess Bride'
