Glad to hear some things have changed for you anyway. I think it is maybe a case of baby steps KWIM. He is at least having sex with you and that is a step in the right direction. Load on the praise (somehow??) and maybe he'll want to do it more and in a more intimate way. Y'know after sex being smily loving W that brings him his coffee in bed in the morning (or whatever), so he gets that cause and effect feeling.
Do you talk at all during sex? Saying stuff can help build up the EC. ILY or you're my one and only or whatever intimate phrase you can think of that builds a connection between the two of you. You don't need to overdo it, just once or twice during the encounter.
I get the sense you are not trusting him? You are worried about the porn and worried the sex is just a cover for what else he might be doing. I can understand that LL. Problem is having these thoughts is sabotaging any EC you could build. Maybe you are right in your suspicions but maybe by acting like you don't feel that way you can build bridges with him that you can't build while you're still holding back. I know how hard it is to put our trust back in someone that has broken that trust but it's a kind of catch-22 situation. He needs to feel that trust coming off you to put himself in the position where he wants to build EC.
Sounds like you are doing better than I am anyhow.
take care
Fran
if we can be sufficient to ourselves, we need fear no entangling webs Erica Jong
