This is the point where we all realize that while DB is great for some people (maybe me, who knows) in terms of saving a marraige/relationship, it's mostly great for saving ourselves FROM ourselves and giving us the best chance at happiness no matter what happens in our R's.
You are at that point where you tried all that DB can offer you in terms of hand's on marriage saving and now it's time to just walk away. I am NOT saying it's over but in many cases, as I have said before, we see that the only real progress is made once the LBS stops trying to make progress. As usual, I know that's not your concern, nor is making a difference in your R with STBXSO a motivating factor but the reality is that you are already seeing your decisions having an effect on him. They likely will continue to have an effect but you know now that you have to continue down this path you've charted for yourself because too many times he's pulled close to you as you pull away, only to run again when you warm up to him.
I still hope that things work out but I know you need to do this to get things rolling for YOU and break the cycle that so clearly is not working for either of you.
Good for you NM. You are a strong woman who seems to have a wonderful support system, including HIS family (how great is that, lol). Take advantage of them and us and you'll be just fine. I know you will, with or without him.
