Thank you for your kindness and insightfulness. Your suggestions are good.
In the beginning months I cried a lot and my S4 - just by virute of being w/ me 24/7 - saw me sad. For the past several months I have not cried often and almost never in front of my S. At first his reaction was to scream at me to stop crying and then maybe he would cry. But the other day after I had been crying in the shower S4 came and asked if he could give me a hug. So cute! I think I have managed to give him the message that it's ok (natural) to cry and that it can help us feel better. Nevertheless, I do everything I can to limit those very sad moments in front of S4.
When S4 asks "is daddy coming over tonight?" I usually say "I think so honey" or, "not tomorrow but the next day".
You're right, H isn't the same person today that I married. He still struggles and certainly his R w. his dad is impactful.
Well, I am super tired tonight!
I'll write more tomorrow....
Monica
My sitch: Me 40 H 30 M 8 yrs 1 S5.5 Bomb Oct 2005 Sep Nov 2005 H w/ Ow I filed for LS June 2007 H responded w/ D 2007 I have sole P custody, joint L Just need to take care of Final Judgement papers
