When I got tangled up in the lie that was my adulterous affair, I definitely thought I did not love my husband anymore.
Had I, I wouldn't have ended up cheating on him in the first place.
The deception starts long before the OM actually enters the picture...
I am torn as to how to answer your question...
On one hand, I'm inclined to tell you to let all that she says roll right off of your back (which will be hard, to say the least) but on the other hand (and I lean more towards this) I want to tell you to tell her to carry her ass on up the road but not to think for one second that she's taking the kids with her.
That's just me talking though .
Now, for the DB answer, which is what you want, I would refer you to Frank_D's old threads (he's in Piecing now)...but due to the length of time your wife's affair has been going on, I am not sure of your level of tolerance....
Straight up....you can beat that SOB at his own game, but you REALLY have to have the stomach for it.
So DB your ass off, DON'T try to be her friend, GAL and spend lots of quality time having fun with the kids.
Above all else, smile, smile, SMILE!
Odds are the longer she's in the house with you and you are not causing her any stress...the OM will be..because he'll hate the she's there with you every night.
And that'll just make you look better and better .
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