My H definately piecing but me...

[74Kim]

When I thought about asking him to move out, I honestly wasnt being manipulative.At least I didnt think so. I do think it might be better to be apart for awhile. But at the same time, I am scared of him to go. And I just wished he didnt want to. Not that I has hoping, he didnt want to. That is one thing I have never done and never do, I dont play any kind of games, Because I know I would probably get burned.

We do go to C and he says he goes to help me get through this, Not for us, but for me. That just burns me, but anyway he'll go I'm fine with that.

I know my expectations of him are high at times. And I do feel I should take them down a notch too. but I dont want to compromise my feelings. I am hurting and he caused that. He did this to me and I want him to fix it for me. I really know deep down, that it cant happen that way, but I want it too so badly.

Ya know on Sunday when I told him my feelings, I felt so good and strong about things and myself. I felt confident in my decision. I told him that I needed to figure out how I can fix this for myself, not depend on him so much. Yesterday, I still felt great. But BAM, today...Im a blubbering cry baby, with no confidence back into my depression. If I am driving myself nuts, I am dtriving him nuts.

I always want complete honesty from all of you. I know that the truth usually hurts and that it will help along in this process. You all are looking in the best intrest. I appreciate pure candidness.
Thanx!