kim-how are you doing?I hope you didn't look over the phone bill.I agree with cat and TL,it only makes you feel worse if you find anything you didn't really need to see.I also did my share of snooping,it did not change anything. We can't change that the A happened.We can not make it dissapear.We just have to decide if we want to forgive and try to work on the R,or forgive and go our separate ways. I also agree that prayer really helps.God dosen't put us through more than he knows we can handle.He does not allow A's to happen,people allow them.We have our own choices to make. I know you are having a hard time,i know your pain.I don't expect you to just forget it or get over it.That is why i always say it takes time.It is not easy.Some days are easier and then some days are terrible.These boards are good for helping people vent,it saves them from taking it out on Spouse. I believe that the spouse acts cold sometimes because they don't really no what to say to us to make us feel better.They know they messed up and i guess they can say sorry so many times,but the real healing comes from them Showing the love and change for better.I really hope you had a good day.take care,K
