Giving my sitch to God

[RBinBR]

OK, PL, I guess I'll try to answer your question now about how I see things happening. I cannot know that W will leave OM, but it will be very dramatic for her if she does. This will not be one of those sitches where the WAS gradually comes back (not unless the divorce happens first, which it may). That is because she is in such turmoil and feels incredible pressure from her family and from her conscience to end the affair, but his emotional grip is so strong.

If that grip relaxes enough for her to make the break, she will still be devastated and will likely be very emotional some time. At that point, she will want comfort and caring, which I don't plan to give her, at least not in the way that I've done it in the past. I want her desire for me to protect her from calling the OM, so I'll "be there" for her only a little. I will not smother her the way I did when she tried to end with him in April. I'll instead let her spend most of her time with her family and with the friend whom she stayed with during that time. We will take things slowly and gradually increase the time we spend together until she feels the romantic attachment return. During this time, we will go to counseling together. When she is ready, we will renew our vows and go on a second honeymoon, even if it's only for a weekend. I know that both of us would want a true fresh start.