Blackfoot is correct that with anyone with any form of pathology as well as with normal folks, well defined boundaries and structure are helpful. It is also helpful to notice and comment on positives.
Cobra, the one thing that isn't helpful is giving in to your own frustrations and name calling and the like. It is understandable but not helpful.
The reason I keep stressing getting your W looked at is that I think at least two of three of those diagnoses are dead wrong. Your descriptions lend themselves much more to some of the personality disorders or maybe the ADD and a personality disorder along with some Generalized Anxiety Disorder and/or Depression. Self diagnosis is a useless enterprise as is, off the cuff diagnosis from "professionals" whose major job is to see the kids. How to approach it? I would point out to her that she isn't happy or enjoying life, that she feels debilitated to some extent and that a good, cogent diagnosis and treatment plan might ease a whole lot of her anxiety.
