From a strictly professional standpoint I think your W needs to be re-evaluated with respect to the OCD, PTSD AND the ADD. Then, when a very good diagnostician gets a very clear view of what is going on appropriate intervention can be discussed. Frankly, you've got a lot of competing, half thoughts going on as to what is going on in her head. That isn't your fault. I don't think the professionals in your W's life have done her or you ANY favors. It is absolutely necessary that you both have a clear picture of what actual pathology is going on (versus normal anxiety, normal messiness etc...), what it means to your W's daily functioning and then get together a plan to tackle things. Your descriptions show a lack of understanding of her actual issues. You understand her FOO very well. What you don't understand is the very real, chronic pathology left behind. Until she is functioning on a more normal level you will continue to be fighting windmills. Please, please get a second or even third opinion. Investigate professionals in your area and get a really good review of any old records, tests, current functioning and get informed.
