I know what you, Mrs. Nop, GEL, and Corri are saying about me not being the casue of my W’s problems. My comments are more directed at Cally and Bear (and maybe others, though I don’t remember who said what). I know I’m not the cause of my W’s problems.
C and I do discuss how I feel, why I react, what my FOO is all about, what I want to do, how long will I put up with this before making a change. She recommends that I try to treat W with compassion like you and everyone else says. She also knows that doing JUST that will not accomplish anything, that I do need to mix in some amount of “push.”
D13’s anger is a direct consequence of the fighting. I know that. In this type of situation, I do believe it is normal to see this in kids. It is not normal to see this in kids who are not in this situation. Yeah, I know it’s a problem. I also know that D13 does NOT want us to D.
So what do you recommend I say to W tonight about her wrongly accusing D13 about her homework and pouring water on her? “Ooops, I guess that was just an oversight, dear?” “No harm, no foul? D13 will understand you were just reacting?” Get real. If this goes unanswered, I can guarantee that W will start to use this tactic more and more. Speaking to her nicely will not stop her since there will be nothing to stop her. Her guilt or conscious does not play into it. Only the recognition of impending consequence. Just what do you recommend?
