You both married each other, if you didn't want to marry him; it was your choice to say no. It takes two to cause this D. That means that your (our) neglect of the R was 50% of the problem.
Don't put ALL the blame on him; b/c if he would stop the D, you would take him back.
Blaming him totally lets us take off the 50% responsibilty we contributed to it. We have to learn from our mistakes.
