SNS, thanks for that. You seem to have a very dim outlook for those of us staying at home and DBing for our M's there. Sometimes I think it would be so much better if I weren't there. My W would have to deal with the real world and it might burst her little fantasy balloon. Then I think of my two children and decision is made, I stay!
Yes, being apart might make a difference but it might mean she just ends up resenting the hell out of me for putting her in that position, who knows. I think if one stays in the sitch without any other reason than to win back the S it would be extremely difficult especially when the S is having "sleep overs". To stay in order to maintain complete access to your kids is a major plus to being in the sitch. You also must find other outlets to create happiness for yourself cuz your S isn't going to do it for you ( and really it is noone elses job to make you happy anyway). Despite being in a difficult position I cannot say I am an unhappy person. I have grown in so many ways and learned many new skills etc and therefore do not draw my happiness from my R with my W. Could I be happier? Darn right! But I take what I can get, try to look at any good as a gift, and DB the best I can. If the old love drug wears off and my W gives me another look, I want to be a person she would be proud to be with and also a person I can feel proud to be. Until then I will be the best Dad I can be cuz that is far more important than whether I am "happy" or not. If the time comes where I can't be in this M as a healthy, caring person then I leave with my head high. Until then whatisis.
