"Of course this is my faut... duh, you just figuring THAT out? I'm also responsible for the Bear Stock Market, the war in Iraq, rising fuel prices, and I single handily put George Bush in the presidential seat. Monica Lewinski was MY idea so I could irreperibly damage one of the most brilliant presidency's in U.S. history... **I** personally punched the hole in the ozone layer, the greenhouse effect was a scheme of mine born of some really great pot smoking haze... **I** bribed Katrina to land in New Orleans... and just so you know, California WILL be falling off the map within five years, but I won't say when 'cuz I don't want to ruin the surprise.
Ruin your confidence? Of COURSE... because when I'm not spreading doom, dispare and destruction in other corners of the world, you are the only one left for me to pick on, and if we don't repair our marriage and get back together, I'm going to be really flippin' bored. I have NOTHING ELSE to do with my time, other than to RUIN YOURS while you walk this planet. K? We clear? Good. Got that one settled.
What would like for dinner? A little cianide or ring worm?"
Well... that's what I'd say.
If you like it, you can print this one and memorize it. But work on the delivery... it comes across much better if delivered fluidly and with just a hint of mirth and a deadpan look on the face.
The INSTANT you give such an absurd notion any serious consideration AT ALL, is the moment you give away YOUR power to him.
So... the way I look at this is... the question is not WHY is he blaming you and should you take the blame, but WHY are you considering running with this football, and what are YOU getting out of it if/when you do?
I'm getting from you that this is not the first time something like this has happened... so... what were you/are you getting out of it?
