It's not going to come to that. But there has to be more than just parental roles. This is what my W is limiting it to. It's degrading the situation further. S4 said this afternoon in the car when I went to pick him up from school "mommy has a real bed downstairs." I have been wondering when he was going to ask me about why she's not sleeping in our bed, and I have no idea what I will tell him when he does. I wonder if he'll ask someone else first, like his teacher or my parents.
I am still going to try and plan to get my W out with me. Last weekend I tried to get her to go hear some music, but she ended up making plans with her friend (who didn't come through - yes, this is the cheerleader friend). When I later told her that I thought we had plans, she told me that she was only going to go because she thought it would make me feel good, she wasn't interested at all. So instead we did nothing. Oh well. There are a couple of movies that I'd like to go see with her, maybe I'll keep trying. It couldn't hurt to do fun things together, outside of the roles of parents. Although she'll no doubt find a way to frame them as attempts to make her miserable. Gotta stop assuming in this pessimistic way. She might surprise me and enjoy my company. She might be looking for light in me and my pessimistic assumptions might prevent my doing or saying the right things. I don't want to sabotage myself.
“No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it. ” – Albert Einstein
