Right on! The "extension of herself" comment hits home. My C said that about my W. She doesn't want a separate individual to be in a R with, she wants herself. This is why she selected the OP she did because this person was so much like her! She fell for herself. No hard work, no differences to work out and no real R. It's a trip that must be taken solo, I can't change it. We can't get inside our W's heads and replace the rusty part. Your W may also be fantasizing about all the similarities between her and the OM, and they are so simpatico, "he knows what I need, you don't"! Expecting another person to make you "happy", know all your needs, and protect you from yourself is, excuse me, looney tunes. My W is in love with an image of herself in the mirror, someone with no substance but who is always there for her, making no demands, having no needs. It's all so perfect but fantasy usually is. Anyway that's the life we're leading Muddle. It's all we got...for now! Rant over.
