Yes, that's a constant struggle for me too. What is he doing; how is he reacting to me; where is he in the universe? Even when I've attempted to detach, I'm like a napping cat whose ears are still on high alert. I look disinterested, but I am following your every peep with my radar ears.
So true, we want so badly for the pain to end. I too have been struggling with that. I think we mistake detachment with not caring and therefore think if we stop caring then we will stop loving and if we stop loving we have to ask "what the F*** am I doing here". So we hang on to their every move and mood. Maybe its best to just start by letting go for an hour every day, then two hours and so on. Break off little pieces at a time. I know I almost blew it big time with my latest little brain cramp and why, because she didn't look directly at me when she answered my question. Yup, somebody's cheese is slipping off his cracker . It's hard to stop analyzing and trying to stay one step ahead of them (although we never succeed, do we) Somehow there's this belief that if we read them we can somehow contol the sitch. Won't happen. It's almost like worrying in a sense. We worry cuz we somehow think it will help! I read a quote a while back "Nobody can tell me that worrying does no good because nothing I worry about ever happens!" Well, enough for one night!
. It's hard to stop analyzing and trying to stay one step ahead of them (although we never succeed, do we) Somehow there's this belief that if we read them we can somehow contol the sitch. Won't happen. It's almost like worrying in a sense. We worry cuz we somehow think it will help! I read a quote a while back "Nobody can tell me that worrying does no good because nothing I worry about ever happens!" Well, enough for one night! 