Chloroform The One You Love

[RBinBR]

SO NOW IT'S MY GODDAMN FAULT HE KICKED ME OUT TO [censored] CASSIE RIGHT?
THAT'S ALL ME.
BECAUSE NOTHING I DO COULD POSSIBLY BE GOOD ENOUGH.
IT'S ALL MY [censored] FAULT.
WELL [censored] YOU TO PAL.

I'M DONE WITH YOUR BULLSHIT.
GO TO HELL IF IT SO PLEASES YOU.
FORGIVE THE [censored] OUTTA ME FOR NOT BEING SUPERHUMAN.
I SUPPOSE YOU ARE PERFECT RIGHT?
I SUPPOSE THAT YOU'RE WIFE IS [censored] SOMEONE BECAUSE YOU ARE STELLAR AND SHE FELT SHAMED IN YOUR GRACE OR SOME [censored] STUPID REASON RIGHT.

Emily, if you ever read my threads, you'd know that I was hooked on porn through most of my marriage. Me, perfect? Not by a long shot. I'm not at all afraid to take responsibility for my part in wrecking my marriage.

My wife is with another guy, but the fact that Jesus has forgiven my sins is the thing that enables me to forgive her and continue to love her, even as my sitch now moves toward a divorce at the one-year mark of the A.

You aren't supposed to be superhuman, Emily, but you are supposed to be a Christian. That means you're supposed to love your enemies, you're supposed to pray for those who hurt you, you're supposed to forgive others if you want your own sins forgiven.

Perhaps that is superhuman after all ... I know that I couldn't do it without Christ in my heart. Emily, how much do your really trust Him? I was a Christian before this, but it wasn't until I decided to let the Holy Spirit truly guide my actions that I got the peace and joy that I have now. I can honestly rejoice over the blessings that God has given me, even as I prepare for a life without the woman I love ... and that is completely by His grace.

PS I love you, Emily. I mean that. I feel like your older brother.