Deciding what to for Christmas is going to be somewhat unique depending on your situation. So, there's no "hard and fast" rule here.
If you have read DB or DR, then most likely you have set some do-able, specific, positive goals for your R. You probably are also watching for specific responses from your spouse that tell you what you're doing is begining to work.
So, ask the question if sending a card, present, etc., is going to help your R move toward your goals. For example, would your Christmas card add to the possibility that your spouse will respond in a hopeful way - one that moves closer to your goals? Measure your actions by how it will most likely impact your goals, OK?
If, after considering this, you do choose to send something, then give some thought to how your card/gift will be perceived by her. For example, would a friend-type card/gift be received better than anything with a romantic undertone? If so, then avoid romantic cards, sayings, salutations, etc..
Your question is one many ask at this time of year - and can be very difficult to discern which way to go. So, I hope I was somewhat helpful. I wish you well,
Laurie
JJ
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