I don't know your sitch, but maybe I can help with your question.
I will assume that your W already knows that you want to stay in your marriage, that you have already told her this, that you have already had some R talk with her. If so, then she already KNOWS that you want to stay married to her. What you SAY, as far as talking about the R right now, is not going to "change her mind." This is all about your actions. Go about making your relationship the best you possibly can WITHOUT TALKING ABOUT IT. I am sure that you can identify some behaviors that do not work with your W. What can you do instead? What are things that you see working that you can do more of?
In thinking about what is working, don't be looking to see if she is ready to jump back into the relationship with you as a guide. You need to list some goals, small ones. What will she be DOING that will tell you you are headed in the right direction? These are little things, baby steps.
Although you might think that R talk is the way to go, you need to resist it as much as you can. Your W will see by your actions that you care about her. There may be a time in the future when R talk will be OK, but that time is not now. Be patient, it can take a long time, but rest assured that the changes that you make will have an impact on your W and your relationship.
JJ
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