Jeanb, I already lost my channel of info by telling him I saw his messages in May. In a way I'm relieved that I don't have to see something that really upsets me. Because that's what it did to me, my world collapsed every time I opened his inbox and saw what the OW's had written to my H. And still I kept my mouth shut for months, until I just couldn't take it anymore.
I don't think H realizes how much the messages hurt me. I wonder if I should tell him? Well, in May when I said I was worried, he just told me to stop worrying. Like it's no big deal.
Looking back I'm glad that I was so patient with him last fall, when he was messaging back and forth with OW all the time. Obviously he had a hard time letting OW go. Had I raised the question then, we might not be here now.
And one thing, the messages from OW1 where so boring, she never had anything interesting to say! Just the same old I love you more and more blah blah blah. Maybe that worked to my advantage...
Ok, maybe I'll just wait and see what happens.
And about how a married man should act, well if they knew that they never would have had the OW in the first place... I do hope they have learned by now that it didn't help.
