More rambling from me, Cuz i really feel like rambling tonight and I know H is not ready for that!!!!
But I did finally, and realy had to do it for myself. I brought up the subject of a continued connection betwn OW and himself.
Because I had read email correspondence from H to OW, I have known they are communicating and this is totally causing my own whacko feelings. I know others may think very differently, but knowing the turth between the OW and my H helps me stay stronger for myself, like no false hopes.
But I did start R ?'s to H, simply asked "do you still communicate?" When I got an angered answer of "yes, some occasional joke emails, just like thousand others do!" it made it very hard to keep silent about knowing there is more. I told H my gut feeling was that there was still a connection between the 2 of them, because H seems unhappy at home.
this angered H, he walks out and drives away. Just like so many times in the past, he tends to run, or hang his head in silence. Rarely yells , but runs.
This time I should feel more positive, he came home after half hour, and apologized in a letter and said "i know running is not the answer" We hugged, said ILY's, But H did not mention OW. Not a denial, nothing. So I know the connection with her is there and knowing she is there, like a vulture on the outside!!!!! so yes alot of this is my continuing letting her get in my head, but at the same time H has me back, and also he has his email and calls to her at the same time---that's the not so good part for my PMA
Now last 2 days H sulky, quiet. Yes, H does need a C, but to approach that with him, again very touchy, gonna continue my waiting and patience, if the time seems right, would like to offer to help with C appointment, but will wait and see. For now I will swear about H here!!!!!, thanks and hugs.
