Mama is still pluggin' along...

[PositivelyListening]

Hi MamaBear,

I know how dissapointed you were finding the phone bill, feeling your H move toward you and ML with you, and then pull away a bit again. However, I believe this is all to be expected. I think the WAS inches back towards the LBS very slowly. 2 steps forwards, 1 1/2 steps back. They are testing the water, making sure they can come back and seeing each time if it will be OK. They are also weaning themselves off of the addictive OW R. What happened is to be expected. Your H may need to do this 5 or 6 times in order to get it accomplished. You must leave him alone with this, leave him to his journey. Don't pressure him. Don't push R talk. Don't force this to be on your timing. You must DB harder than ever right now. You do not want to lose what you have gained - there has been SO MUCH PROGRESS. So, here's my recommendations:
Focus on the positives
Write down the baby steps, every time, so you can see them
GAL, GAL, GAL activities
No snooping! Base your decisions/actions on behaviors
Be kind, lovingly detached (yes, AGAIN!!!)
Patience, patience, patience

No expectations right now MamaBear. Your H is working some stuff out. You will know when he is truly back. Meanwhile, there will be these slow, small steps, with a back step every time in between. I know this is easier said than done, but try to find the humor in it too. I mean really, at this point it is so predictable it's funny. Try to find your lightness of being, if you can. Because things aren't any worse than they were 2 weeks ago. Two weeks ago, you hadn't ML in a LOOOONG time. So, remember, focus on all the positives. Just the good stuff right now. Write them down, and look for them when you see H. What do you like about him? Focus on only that for thetime being, and watch it grow.

BTW, there are books that talk about body and when certain parts of the body are ill or hurting, it is related to certain aspects of the being. Louise L. Hay has quite a few books on this. The back and back pain refers to a need for support. So, if you have it in you MamaBear, realize that your H needs a little support on his journey to become healthy and strong again. Give him your generous love and understanding when you can, and keep yourself as busy as possible when you can't. Your H is coming along. It's all perfect. I promise. Hang in there, MamaBear. Patience now, especially now.