Our therapist gave us some exercises to work on things for both of us. As she was anxious she needed to learn to stay with that anxiety and I needed (still need) to give her feelings of safety and care in the anxiety producing situations.
We needed to enter into difficult and anxiety producing situations and stay with the feelings that came up while maintaining a safe and caring environment to get a hold of some very negative emotions we had around sex.
I your wife is truly avoidant of intimacy and your just talking I’m afraid you’re going to be spinning your wheels. I think you may need to find a new therapist. The great thing about “divorce busting” is that it is actionable. Talk therapy is good but actually building intimacy through action with your wife is what is needed.
What steps do you think you can take to deal with your wife’s anxiety regarding sex and intimacy?
