Quote: Thank you for understanding my sitch... Yes, I do That is why I do what I believe I must do, try to learn as much as I can to be sure I am not taking the wrong path, and stick to my beliefs regardless of what he consensus says.
It takes alot of huevos to do this... just 'look' before you leap...
Quote: Our counselor sees this quite clearly too, has been trying to get through to W on this, but has been met with the very same resistance and types of excuses that I get.I told her that Harley recommends 15 hours per week together, to which she replied that she could not do that because of her job. I told her that Harley recommends finding a new job, but of course that fell on deaf ears.
Question: Is Harley your counselor? And if so... does your W feel as if he is 'on your side'? Could that be why suggestions fall on 'deaf ears'? I know when our counselor even hinted that our problems was his fault too... he stopped going. Has your W shown resistance to going?
Quote: I should not feel betrayed each time she turns on me, when I think things have been going well, and feel that all the previous buildup of good will was not honest. Those are my issues. I need to trust that she does not trust and find a way to live with that (yeah, right!)
I absolutely know how you feel here! It's like having the rug jerked out from under you over and over... and over. Then when you're invited to step back onto that rug and dig your toes in... you start feeling like an idiot. and I don't know about you... but MY trust in words... (his)expressed feelings evaporate. And worse... I don't trust myself anymore to make a logical decision. Because stupid me, I keep stepping onto that damn rug thinking; it'll be different this time. This time he means what he says. This time, just because he gets depressed, overwhelmed and guilty, it doesn't mean he's going to yank that rug away again. HA! Surprise!
Quote: As for your issues with me “forcing” the kids to take TKD, well, its just your issue. I have my reason for them getting their black belts. There is a lot more to it than just learning forms or doing kicks.
I applaude you Cobra. I don't have this issue now... and i was a Mom that let my kids pick their own pursuits... their own way... but do you know my 24 year old son has told me that he wishes that my H and I would have forced him to play sports or something of that nature?? parents are there to guide their children, push them or even force them to do what they believe; in the big picture, will benefit their kids. I believe that is what you are doing. They will thank you later!
I believe that is what you are doing. They will thank you later!