Please don't see any judgement in my comments. My heart goes out to you! I would probably do the same thing. If she's there you can still work at your goals. Keep DBing and show her you are the man she wants to be with. The OM might just fade away if she feels her needs are met. Again, as others have told me, the OP is like a drug and that high is hard to let go of. The "fantasy" that person provides is pretty powerful when you compare it to the mundane day to day existence we LBS's seem to offer (in their minds anyway). My W was best friends with the OP in my sitch and guess what.... became more than friends. The OP offered her a fantasy R that can be kept at an intense pace with limited contact. It's like adolescence all over again. They sneak around, it's all seems so romantic....as they degrade themselves yet they just don't see it. It's nuts but what can you do. Hang in there, guy. Remember to GAL through all this because even if it doesn't work out you will have your own life and self respect, you'll like you! That's a hell of a lot to have.
