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Emily, I challenge you to name one way that a divorce will make your life easier. HE couldn't hurt me any more. He couldn't come crawling back . . . show me SOME teeny little forward motion . . . and then walk again. I could just move on. I DO REALIZE THAT MY EMOTIONAL VALIDATION can't come from him. I get that. . . why the hell do you think I want him out of my life so badly. . . everytime I start to build ANYTHING . . . I LET him back in and he comes raring in and crashs it all to hell. The only reason you want it is so you can find another man to attach yourself to and make you feel loved ... and then we'll go through all of this again. LET ME MAKE SOMETHING PERFECTLY CLEAR TO YOU RB . . . PAINFULLY CLEAR I HOPE! I NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER WANT ANOTHER ANYONE IN LIFE. I NEVER WANT ANOTHER MAN. Ya know what? I Don't give a f- about ever having another man in my life. As a matter of fact if I get divorced . . . I hope no man EVER talks to me again. I LOVE my H with my whole heart . . . that's why I am here. I could never love another. . . not without always wondering about . . . well everything that has gone wrong here. It wouldn't be fair to anyone. DO you get that? I know I have talked about it before . . . . BUT after all of the bullsh*t . . . I don't care if I ever get close to another person EVER.

If you really wanted to get better, you'd take our advice and not talk to Kevin for a while, but you don't want to change or really improve your life. I'm NOT going to talk to him. Hopefully never again. I am waiting for him to call about the kids. After that conversation . . I am DONE with his sorry a$$
Emily, you still haven't gotten your driver's license. Why? I finally got the physical last week. Now to save up the 35 dollars and make sure I know the stuff! Sorry that in the past 9 months this hasn't been first on my list. You need to do the things that will give you the life you want, and you need to take responsibility for your own life, instead of playing this little game that your life has been ruined by Kevin. Yeah . . . so why the hell not just get rid of him . . . I swear I read the things you say and it feels like you are contradicting yourself!