Quote: Me: Hey, you won't believe what a great deal I got on those NYC plane tickets today. REALLY CHEAP!!!! W: WHAT?!?!? I thought we had discussed that I wasn't sure I wanted to go to NYC. (she starts listing her reasons) (I grab her and kiss her to stop her protest) Me: Knock it off woman, the tickets are already paid for. And how in the world am I going to give you your Xmas present, which is IN NYC, if we don't GO to NYC. (I smirk at her and walk off)
Let me have it!!!!!
Okay.
I think we are confusing a juvenile highschool level idea of what "alpha-ness" is and are trying to institute it into relationships that are already shot to hell with lack of intimacy.
We seem to be confusing immature pushiness with manly assertiveness.
Given your existing situation, where trust is broken and has not been repaired, intimacy as you are wanting to promote above is a forced intimacy and doomed to fail.
Smirks are right out.
Have you stopped all contact with the other woman? What is your current daily plan for rebuilding trust with your wife? Because trust isn't built on big one-time occurances.
I'm not trying to piss in your wheaties, but I strongly believe you are putting the cart before the horse. Advice given based on false information is wasted advice and can do more harm than good.
