I think HP's husband is a pretty good example of how not to be an alpha.
I remember AtlDave sharing with us an conversation during the first meeting with a counselor. The counselor asked, "Do you go by 'Dave' or 'David'?" He replied, "Either one, I don't really care." The counselor said, "Why not?" It stopped him cold. The indecision or the non-preference or the "whatever you want" is a characteristic of the non-alpha.
An alpha needs to care enough to be called by his preferred name, and yes, needs to have a preference.
