Just try to be honest, open and direct as soon as you can in these sitches, ESPECIALLY since your W is doing the unthinkable (at least compared to my W) and actually ASKING you what you are thinking. You don't even have to worry about her not wanting to hear it, something that plagues most of us.
Like I said, just try to keep things out in the open and respect her willingness to wonder how you are doing. She isn't asking because she thinks she'll hear all about roses and wonderful things. She knows you may be thinking/feeling some bad stuff but she still asks. That takes some bravery on her part. Reward it with courage of your own to tell her what's on your mind and in your heart. You know how much it hurts to wonder all the time. Show her how to open up so she might do it with you too.
