More 3 Years On... background and update

[meanmydogs]

Howdy-doody folks!!

Ive still got no e.mail Calder, the cable company say its not a fault at that end, as I can still access the internet, but my neighbour is coming in on Tuesday to try to sort it out for me, hopefully I,ll be able to write you then

Chipdick is still "missing in action", he,s been "out of the country" for a few weeks apparently, no idea where or why and no urge to find out either. My house has a SOLD sign on it though , which means chipdick is in breach of the Court Order because we had to agree on a price etc, and he hasnt kept me informed of anything, so my Solicitor is dealing with that at the moment. Im sad its sold, but its another step to putting everything behind me, and Ive got to accept it and get on with it.

I had a strange night the other night A relation of mine has been keeping on and on about this guy she knows, shes known him for 20 years and has often talked about him, and apparently had shown him a photograph of me over a year ago, and he kept asking her to fix us up for a night out Ive said NO so many times, but the other night I said OK, just a drink, no strings attached, mainly to stop her going on!!

Anyway, I had no idea what he looked liked, all I knew was his name was Stuart, he was Divorced, very well off financially, and wasnt an axe-murderer, which helps.

In my mind this was JUST a night out, not a date, and I trusted her judgement. Silly really!!

I sorted out a good back-up plan if I wanted to escape, had phone calls lined up for certain times, and 2 mates "following me" when I went to meet him in Town.

When I turned up he was already there and came straight over, and my first thought was "RESULT"!!! He was drop-dead gorgeous.

Then he spoke, " Hi, weally nice to meet you, Im Stuawt. What do want to dwink". OK, I thought, he cant sound his Rs, that could be cute I guess, and we went and sat at a table.

He was THE most boring person in England, Im sure of it. He talked non-stop about Fishing (he goes evwey weekend to the same spot at the same wiver, theres a certain wock he sits on ) and even though my glass had been empty for the best part of an hour, he didnt get any more drinks, and when I tried to get some he said "Its too expensive in here, save your money for later , we,ll go for a meal"

We walk to a road where there are a few different Restaurants (Not Fish Restaurants thankfully , I couldnt wait to get off the subject of Fish!!!), and he stopped to look at the prices on the menu,s outside of the first 2, but they were too expensive apparently, and we finally get in and get seated at a table near a toilet in a dingy dark Restaurant. By now I was pizzed off and didnt really want to stay, but thought Id give it a little more effort. His voice was REALLY starting to annoy me now, not because of his speech impediment totally, I wouldve liked it if he was good company, but his whiney-voice started to seem suited to him and made me want to smack him.

He says " Order whatever you want. Within reason" and made comments all the time about the prices. I offered to pay for my own, and he didnt say anything. The waiter comes over and asks if we,d like anything to drink, and I asked for some Wine, Stuart says "White or Wed?" and before I could even stop myself, I say "Wed Please" Then I had the giggles That soon stopped though because then the waiter starts showing me different bottles of wine on the menue, and Stuart says "No, not a bottle, just a glass please". I realised then, this guy was tighter than a ducks ass No wonder he was well-off, he never spends!!! I told the waiter to bring a bottle, and told Tight-ass Id pay for it. I needed it!!!

We look at the menu, and out of all the dishes Stuart could order, what does he order?? WAVIOLLI, thats what! I spluttered wine all over the table I didnt even order any food, I just wanted to drink by then, so I told him to carry on, that I wasnt hungry. He liked that.

I was a bit merry by now and the giggles came back, the more he spoke the more I had to try not to laugh. I ordered him a drink (he hadnt bought himself one) as we waited for his food to come, and I asked him if he minded if I smoked. He said " Yes Actually, Id prefer it if you didnt". So, Id prefer it if you didnt breath, tight-ass, but do you hear me complaining??

I went and sat on another table so I could smoke, and the more I thought of this stupid night-out, the more I had to resist the urge to march over to his table and flick ash in his dwink. I go back over and sit down and his food comes, so I pick up a breadstick and start to nibble on it and try to make conversation, and at one point I mustve pointed the breadstick in his direction, because he suddenly puts his hand OVER his food, then says "Oh, sowwy, I thought you were going to dip that bweadstick in the sauce, I hate it when people do that to my food"

I went to the loo, came out and said Id had a phonecall and I had to go. I asked the waiter if he could call me a Taxi, and Stuart says, "If you wait a few minutes, I,ll come with you, theres a bus-stop a short walk away" but I said No, I was fine, he should finish his meal, and I asked him how much I owed him for the bottle of wine, so he had a look and told me how much it was, then said "Just give me half". I said Id rather pay for it all, I wouldnt want him to think I was mean with my money, but he didnt notice the sarcasim and said ok. The taxi came, so I picked up my bag, said it was nice to meet him, and then picked up a breadstick and stuck it right into his Raviolli, scooped up a bit of sauce and stuck it in my mouth and said " Thats weally tasty, bye then!" and went.

I will NEVER listen to my family again or trust their judgemnt when they fix me up. His only redeeming quality was that he was good looking and not called Wichard.