always and Gwyn you are sight for sore eyes!!! thanks so much for coming over, been looking for you two for a while! The anger is subsiding, but just in case I carry a piece of paper w/ posts to me (like yours) to read them whenever I feel bumbed, you both are heaven sent! I want to be free from this new monkey on my back, and slowly but surely is happening, managed to even be affectionate towards H before he left for the academy. The only thorn in me is why he sent her flowers, the damn flowers again!, on her b-day on April when he came home, was he still contacting her? he erased some things on his phone before handing it to me when I found out about the A. When I screamed at him about the flowers he never did tell me why and now I'm getting all worked up about it and want to ask him calmly if he still was getting over her. ARGHHHHHHHHH, small set back here. I already told him I wasn't going to talk about what happened before he came back, well, this is after he came back, I so want to bring it up tonight. Great, there goes all the progress I've done.
For the most past Im 2/3 of the way there processing the A and do have some more peace of mind about the whole thing. I sure as heck won't look anymore, details do make things lots worse, I finally understand that now.
Be not afraid...I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten Joel2
30something 2kids survivor of S, MLC, A, D I have peace in my heart, at last.
