Reading up on your posts. I KNOW how you feel, we all do! I'm piecing too and some days are good and some days are bad, but the one thing I can tell you is that if you don't let go, you will destroy everything that you want so bad. If you want your marriage to survive, you have to let it go! Your H made horrible mistakes and probably will in the future but it sounds like to me he wants to be with YOU - not the ow. Your H, like mine, knew what his consequences would be but he got so caught up at the time it didn't seem to matter. Now, that the cloud lifted, he sees the damage and now he has to live with it. Piecing, IMHO is harder than walking away. You have to be goal oriented. Get through today, then tomorrow, then the next without snooping, loosing your temper, etc. Take one day at a time. Don't look at the big picuture right now, you're not ready for that. Take one day at a time. Get up in the morning with a positive attitude. Tell yourself "I'm happy today" and be happy throughout the day. Then when you go to bed, say to yourself "I made it -tomorrow I will decide to be more compassionate and then do that. One day at a time. That's what I do and again, sometimes I'm successful, sometimes I'm not, but I pick myself up, set my goal for tomorrow and strive to meet that goal.
