****only God can fill that hole I have - which I KNOW

y'all both have a hole. A void if you will. Trying to figure out how to fill that hole is life.

****but I'm unable to completely let GO of it

Yes you can.

****But, he did say that one of the reasons he has hope for us is that we KNOW what our problems are, we just have to work thru them.

That's half the problem.

**** it's so much easier to b*itch about the other person, isn't it

No it is just easier to b^itch and not work on a solution.

You a good gal B.I. I can sense that. I think you are trying to hard, but that is in your nature.