Believing-- quote: <<that whole validating thing feels so forced, or fake-sounding. I am trying, I just wish I had a better stash of tools in the relationship toolbox.>>
remember back when your kids were small and they were trying to help? remember how you had to praise every little thing they did to reinforce positive behavior, rather than giving [bad] attention to their bad behavior?
isn't this almost the same thing? would you like your H to constantly focus on the things you do wrong? can you imagine how you would feel if he started thanking you for all the littles things you did nice? Remember what they say, its the little things that count. and when we get fed up, its often a ton of little things that drive us nuts...that alone are so petty but when added together make one heck of a big wall. we can praise the little things, or we can ignore them. praise is so much better, and makes us want to do even more.
just some random thoughts to redirect your feelings. good luck at work!
