No hijacking please

[honeypot]

Jackson, really? Hmmm, I can tell you that my LDH would have something different to say. He'd agree wholeheartedly with what you wrote as far as saying what he likes about me and my endearing qualities. If, however, we are talking about sexual attraction, nope a painting aint gonna do it. Unless it's a painting of my azz, LOL.

I suppose what I'm getting at is that a person is comprised of a bunch of different moods and urges. I don't think you can break it down to "Some people are attracted to painted nails and some people are attracted to paintings"..it's deeper than that. Some days my H wants a more intimate, deeper connection, other times he just wants the eye candy.

However, I don't even think we are talking necessarily about what men like. This thread is not even ABOUT men. It's about women and how seemingly small differences like underclothes or manicures send a subtle message to the woman's brain and makes her feel differently about herself, thereby sending off a *totally* different vibe than she normally would.

I can tell you that my everyday wardrobe consists of casual mom-style clothes: jeans, capris, sandals, etc. However, there is a big difference in my attitude towards MYSELF when I am wearing sexy panties underneath the jeans and high heeled sandals instead of flip flops. It is this feeling that these ladies--and myself--are trying to capture. It is not necessarily about trying to attract a man, it's about trying to attract yourself.

HP

[cinemanymph]

Corri,

Thank you for the great advice. I am throughly enjoying this research, although, I am pretty sure I couldn't order C*nt through the interlibrary loan service .

As far as clothes go, there are women who can pull off slutty clothes and look sexy and there are women who try to look sexy and come off seeming trampy. I think it's all in the motive. If a woman is dressing sexy because she feels sexy, she will exude sensuality/sexuality. If she is dressing sexy to attract attention or because that's how everyone else is dressing, then there will be a projection of desperation that will translate into trampiness. Does this make sense?

MJ, jackson, Lou, and Chromo,

Thank you, Chromo. I agree that there needs to be that certain something, because how many men can maintain attraction to a well dressed manniquen (sp?) for long? Maybe that certain something is a sense of adventure, a childlike wonder, and ability to laugh, willingness to see things from different POVs all dressed up in a very womanly body. Am I completely off here? Am I pasting what I think would positively affect attraction over the spectrum of human experience? Or is it an issue of degrees?

Cobra,

I am listening to the NPR broadcast on aging. I had to laugh at the "creeping decrepitude". I still try to stay fresh and listen to new music, and read young authors. I pick and choose what appeals to my sensibilities, but try not to fall into the rut of only liking those things that are in alignment with what I have already experienced (ie only those new artists who are derivitive Led Zeppelin or Thomas Pynchon). I am open to getting tatoos, body piercings and other things that may be the province of the young.

honey,

I think you are absolutely right, it's the little things that help the overall effect. I heard somewhere that a womans underclothes must match. This has stuck with me over the years. This sometimes poses a shopping nightmare for me . If my underthings don't match, I feel out of sorts.

Martelo,

I think your point is valid, but one of the problems I see with taking a gay man's advice is that he is only asthetically attracted to a woman, where as a straight man is going to enjoy the whole feast, if you kwim. General consensus here is that it isn't about being perfectly manicured and appointed, but rather having a strong sense of yourself expressed clothed or unclothed.

[cinemanymph]

Karen,
You got me thinking. How about enchanting minx, bombshell seductress, or fierce rocker chick?

[Lillieperl]

I heard somewhere that a womans underclothes must match.

Must match what?

[cinemanymph]

Matching bra and panties.

[Martelo]

Ok I should have said take no mans advice.

I will add that I was spacifically talking about
things other than superficial trappings of gender,
but I can see how that may not have been clear.

Good advice from this can only come from other
females, because its about feeling and being.

[CeMar]

Chromosphere:

What I believe you all are talking about is sexual confidence. Dr. Beverely DeAngiles says that this is the most important characteristic that men are looking for in women. It has nothing to do with the way you look, or your body shape. It is all about being confident physically in your own skin. Men can sense this. I have seen this once in a women that had to be over 60. She was attractive for a women of her age, and she clearly was NOT ashamed of her body. She took her older body and dressed nicely, made up her hair and make-up, and because she had ample bossom, she wore a deep vee cut to CLEARLY show cleavage. She just OOZED confidence, and she was hot! So many women just give up with their looks as they age, she took what she had and made it clear that she knew she could still turn heads. It is clear that ANY type person can be confident, you don't have to be a size 3 to be hot.

[chromosphere]

CeMar,

Very good analysis CeMar! Now turn that around to the masculine side. What does it take for a man to turn women's heads? What are you doing in that regard to create interest in your W? Or are you just assuing (like I'm afraid many men do, including myself at times) that your W should somehow magically find desire for you because she is supposed to as your W? I don't mean that in a condescending way. If you WANT desire, you have to create a reason for it. Be a manly man and your W will likely respond. If she doesn't, then you can start delving into her FOO or whatever.

JM(absolutelY)HO

Chrome

[Martelo]

Thought this was the no highjack thread.
The topic does probably need its own thread.

[Chrissy]

My thought Cyn would be sensuality. Sensuality comes from confidence/self acceptance so the mixture is like dynamite. It is evident that a these people are comfortable in there own skin reguardless of what they have on there back feet or face.