Should I even be here?

[Just_Me]

When she calls now, I'll make a gesture like sending her something, a card, a gift, flowers, whatever and thank her for calling/caring and does that mean she wants to give us a try.

I don't like the idea and it seems passive-aggressive. So, divorced people can't talk? If I talk to my first XW she could send me a gift, say "thanks for caring", and "does this mean you want to try again?"?

You are someone that she has confided in and shared many things with. That doesn't just die out, but it does eventually. The WAS moves on with their life and the calls stop. If you don't want her calling you or you can't be friends, then I think you need to be honest with her and tell her that you don't want to be friends (although asking her on a cruise, letting her share your house, etc says otherwise).

I asked that controlling question once also. Not sure how far that extends. Disagreements/differences of opinion on how things should go will always occur. I think in the beginning, the wife goes along with things she doesn't necessarily agree with, but then bears a grudge. And you would do the same if you always agreed. There has to be a compromise at times to avoid someone being controlling.

Me