Quote: Hmmm, not sure what the take away from your post is. Does it mean that most women are only interested in dating guys that are looking for "the one"?
Women are more likely to be looking for "the one," when they are dating. Men are more likely than women to approach dating casually with little to no expectations. OR with the expectation that it's just for now.
That's just my experience. Not that I've had a lot.
Quote: can someone thousands of miles away be considered "in the wings"
"In the wings" probably wasn't the right term. What I meant to say was that you have your hopes in your xw right now. That takes a lot of seriousness away from the dating thing. Not saying that's right or wrong, one way or the other. It actually may be a nice benefit, since taking dating seriously probably just leads to needless and unproductive heartache.
I have been thinking of going out with a woman I recently met, who says she knows lots of men I could spend time with. The thought of going out like this would have stressed me out before. I would have felt pressured to make a good impression and take everything personally. But, since I'm sure that H is wanting to give it a go, I feel no "need" to hit it off with any men I happened to meet in a social setting. Ironically, this probably makes any interaction I have with the opposite sex in a social setting, much more pleasant (for everyone involved). Such a frustrating catch-22. I wish I could pay someone to install some social/dating skills in my brain somewhere.
*Yes I know the prospect of me dating right now is weird. Maybe I'll go into it on my thread sometime.
Quote: Isn't there always someone in the wings i.e. always more fish in the sea?
Perhaps it's just the difference between how a male vs. female mind works, or how a self-confident vs. not self-confident person thinks...but there's a big difference between "more fish in the sea" and the real or hoped-for presence of another person. You can't focus on the unknown fish in the sea like you can on a person you know and have history or prospects with. Other fish in the sea don't take the pressure or seriousness away from dating. At least not for me.
Quote: You're right that I don't really have a lot wrapped up in the women I date but it may be fearing the burn more than anything so not putting the heart out there.
This is true.
Quote: Do see that may come off as not interested which is a lot of what I'm looking for (a gal that seems interested in me) when I'm out on a date.
Looking uninterested is a sure way to repel interest. This has been my life-long hang up. I'd rather look uninterested in a guy, thereby rejecting him before he can reject my. Aaaaaaahhhhh yes, my coping skills have taken me far in this life.
Quote: So your post has resulted in some deep thoughts and progress, thank you very much
