Hairydude, Nurturing, in your case, may mean simply stopping the whole Manservant routine. The cooking and cleaning, etc. I would continue to do your share but maybe cut back a bit and explain that this is going to be time spent on yourself. Taking classes (great idea! Loved that one), etc. Even if it's just time spent on the couch watching the boob tube. (But not boobs on the tube, cause come on, D5 will be with ya right)
Simple things like having some down time FOR YOURSELF will probably *feel* nurturing to you and that is the objective, eh.
Quote: If massages are making you cry... then in my opinion... you need one once a day until the tears stop.
I agree with Corri. Why don't you post an ad on Craig's list or somewhere similar that you are willing to barter under-the-table legal services or cooking for massages if you're short on cash?
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
Also, massage therapy training programs (at community colleges or specialized schools) offer massages at greatly reduces prices. When I was in massage therapy school (500-hour program, lasted a year) one of the BEST things was getting massages three times a week when we students worked on each other.
Thanks for the book recommendation...it's on the list, just don't know when I'll get to it
Cool, if it encourages you at all it's not a R book. I found it to be a welcome change of pace because for people like me (and I think you too but correct me if I'm wrong) who feel sort of helpless to change our M's....well, this book sort of feels like a healing balm to me.
When you get to it, please don't forget to tell me what you think.
Oh and about the massage thing....check out 'schools' of massage therapy. There are typically students there as well as licensed therapists and the prices are MUCH cheaper than any kind of spa massage. I pay $40 for an hour and I try to go once every couple of months. Go to a same sex therapist if you feel like you need to-I don't imagine that if you went to a male you'd come out crying because you hadn't been touched like that in such a long time, lol. Unless you've spent some time on broke back mountain that you forgot to mention to us cyber pals.
Sorry, I just realized Lil pointed out the same thing about reduced prices with students. I missed it.
Last edited by heatherg; 08/17/0607:37 PM.
"Happiness is a butterfly, which, when pursued, is always just beyond your grasp, but which, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you."
Thanks for all the recommendations and ideas about massage. I think I'll just get Lil to give me a freebie.
Really...it's not that big of a deal. To me, massages fit under the column of "pampering" rather than "nurturing." That is just my view.
My birthday plans for tomorrow are to have the kids be my slaves for a day and have them do the cleaning I'd normally do on the weekend. In the afternoon/evening, I hope to go with all of them to a little waterpark near my house. They have a "lazy river" that sounds too good to be true.
Ah...but hairdog, pampering IS nurturing...whether you do it for yourself, or someone else.
When you buy a massage (for example) or a spa day for your W or a female relative....you would consider that pampering right? But it's a nurturing thing to do for someone...giving them a gift that makes them "feel" good. Why in the world do you think so many women do enjoy going to spas, or getting their nails done, or changing their hair styles? When they walk out of a spa/salon, they feel good about themselves. Sure, it's a treat too....but the portion of it that makes you "feel" good is the nurturing part of it.
