Kim, hi. One important point that i have wanted to mention and keep overlooking.--I truly feel that the marriage i have now is not ,nor will ever be the same that i had.I believe it died.One of my problems in therapy was "i didn't feel the M would ever be the same"I wanted it to be like it was with no problems.In reality though it couldn't be like it was,because it was flawed.So eventually i learned that my M is a new M.Same man that i loved only a new start.A new marriage.When i looked at it from this aspect i finally learned to accept the new and put the old past behind.After 6 yrs,i don't have the marriage i used to have.I still have my H and i have my family,and i am happy,but it is a different M.It is like divorce in a way,like a death.You grieve and then you move on.Your relationship is a new one.It can be a better one.Take care,K
