Quote: I am still hoping to hear from a HD wife who became LD and then returned to her HD state...without a divorce or an affair!
Well... hmmm not sure if I qualify exactly but I am a female who has gone from HD to LD to NO D to LD and back to HD. Keep in mind these terms for me are relative to my own ups and downs as no matter how HD I think I am H's drive always seems to be higher, hard to keep up with. I'm not sure I can explain all the different drive levels in one post as this covers a span of 26 years. But the most recent phase that brought back the HD in a quick synopsis, our youngest child moved out and I was thinking of becoming a WAW, started doing a lot of reading to save the M rather than destroy it as I knew I still loved H deeply we just had somehow disconnected. I read DB, DR, SSM, 5LL, The road less travelled etc. A lot of the books talk about sex being a love connection for the male and not just sex. I think somewhere in my pea brain I knew this but didn't really GET IT. I realized in order to connect with H again it needed to start in the bedroom. It was a conscious decision to do it for him, it did not start as DESIRE. After a week or so (H is a quick learner) H started to make an obvious effort to meet my needs, QT. The DESIRE to meet OUR sexual needs returned. I am also at a state where I feel better about my body, we don't have any worries of children walking in, we have the freedom of the whole house, we can do all the little things during the day (grab each other, hugs and kisses when passing each other etc) that lead to "can't wait to get you into bed" and sometimes we don't wait I guess what I am trying to say is there is hope cuz based on outside circumstances and stress and what was going on in our life my drive was all over the place. Does that help any? NR
