I think CeMar has hit on some truths, but has communicated differently than I would have. Here are my points (if I may jump in own my thread):
1) I am in the camp of staying married for the kids, but either way it is a loss-loss situation. My parents got divorced. My brother has never forgiven them for it. Myself, I am not so bothered by it. I do know that studies have shown (recent ones) that parents who stick together "for the kids", over 65% stay married after the kids leave. There is something to be said about history and experience that CeMar and his wife may learn in the interim.
2) CeMar mentioned that his LD females don't respect their husbands subconciously if they stay and that it takes a divorce sometimes for them to change. In a way, I agree. I feel that for a lot of people a change in perspective is needed for true change. Lots of people are afraid of change or lazy. For example, a LD spouse who feels solo sex is wrong and dirty. However, the husband passes away and she learns to explore out of necessity and loneliness. Then acceptance quickly follows.
Same situation for ML. I think for a lot of LD spouses, unfortunately, may not make the true effort to become HD or look into the reasons why unless a change in perspective occurs that really makes you look at yourself.
Look at a lot of the people on this board. A change in perspective has occurred. WAW, WAH, divorce, etc...
I really think that some people need to stop treating CeMar so harshly. In some ways, he is speaking the truth. My only advice is to bring hope back into the equation. Strange things have happened when you work and want them to be. Just do it in a respectful way.
