I want to try to head this off before it goes much farther. I am not upset at all by your words or actions. I think you are trying VERY hard to understand what your H (and I for that matter) are going through. I guess I just felt like I wasn't being honest with you by sugarcoating some of what I said, because I was doing that.
I DO want to help you and I am both compassionate towards you AND your H, but believe it or not, you first because YOU are the one here getting help.
What often happens with ALL of the posting here, not just to a thread where the "other side" is expressed, is that we often project our sitches onto each other, even if it's a terrible fit.
I think I did that unfairly to you and for that I am sorry. You just said some things that REALLY hit home (and I mean that in a good way) and made me realize how off I may be in my own thinking IF my W does really think like you do.
In fact, not only have you not upset me, you have been largely responsible in me really trying again to empathize with my W and understand how our daily interaction may be perceived by HER instead of assuming it was the same as MY perception. I can't thank you enough for that.
I can only hope to help you as much as you have already helped me.
SO, let's start over again here and I will try to get back to the compassion and try to give you what I can in terms of help/advice/comparison/information about my feelings in all this since there DOES seem to be some similarity in our sitches.
