Quote: Chromo you entirely missed the point of this.
Or did I see the point and knew that if I responded in a certain way, it would jog you to give us one of your wonderful MF dynamics seminars? Kindof like a teacher's pet asking leading questions in class.
Quote: However, you know I think your W is highly sexually receptive, just repressed. You know when you behave appropriately, so does she. A womans HD/LD is not in absence to her perception of her H. Its because of it.
I want to believe this SOOO badly. That if I can just start acting the right way for a long enough period of time, then her inner sex kitten will just come out naturally without any direct prodding on my part. That would be the ideal situation anyway, CeMar would agree.
I want to believe that my W does have a high level of sexuality and desire that is buried. I have seen glimpses of it.
Quote: If a man is unwilling to make steps to change his Wifes perception of him, he will have NO STATUS QUO CHANGE. If a woman wants to have a succesful M, it is her job to control her perspective.
These seem like potentially conflicting statements. Care to elaborate?
Quote: The tougher/stubborn/forceful she is, the more her H will have to be self assured.
I can see this very clearly, and it is the backdrop for my "she's just testing my resolve" frame of mind whenever I start losing my self-assurance. Whenever I keep myself in "this is a test, it is only a test" mode, I can more easily plow through the budding resentment and act appropriately. I'm not always successful though, so I'm sure that causes problems with her trust of me.
Quote: Self assured appears to other people when you have immovable boundaries. when your boundaries fluctuate, you appear placating. Even if your boundaries are not in her best interest, as long as you arent placating or supplicating she will continue to have desire.
I was going to say, let's talk concrete examples, but maybe that would be good for another thread. I'll start one. We should also discuss how to shift a boundary without it being supplicating.
Chrome
"Recollect me darlin, raise me to your lips, two undernourished egos, four rotating hips"
