Emily - I say, don't worry about being tough or not. This is not a time to pursue, punish, or push. It's a time to Wait and See what he will do. Just be calm and wait. Either he will dump her off, come running back to you, and agree to the things you tell him he will have to do to regain your trust - OR - he won't.
As for him not calling you right now - let's be realistic, okay? He's stuck on the road with this woman. Calling you in front of her will only provoke her. He's told you his plans to get out of the sitch - give hin the time and space to do so. Don't give her the chance to look good by being a crazy person on the phone with him. You want to look GOOD in comparison to her - you want to look calm, loving, SANE, while she looks pushy and obnoxious.
Take a mental vacation from the sitch for a week, okay?
