I'm REALLY worried that if I make the wrong move now it'll be over and my girls and I are without him forever. I'm trying to get a feel for the sitch. I'm trying to wait and see how much he is feeling/doing. If I come off "half-cocked" at him. I know what he'll do . . he'll get REALLY mad and leave. That's his style. If he thinks I'm bluffing and puffing up at him. He'll take it all the wrong way and it'll all be over. I have to get my mind around somethings first. I have to come to terms with divorce before I even dare to fully get tough with him. I'M NOT THERE.
Emily, I find it scary how you seem to think that everyone here is cheering you and advising you on getting divorced. Have you not realized where you are? Do you really think that all these wonderful people here, telling you to think about yourself, stand strong, protect yourself... are doing this so you'll get a D?????? You've suggested this various times, not just this once.
You have to get tough and be separated for a while to SAVE you marriage, not to get divorced. The whole fear of dropping the rope in fear that H will flee is DB basics. He has flown! Re-read the book.
In an earlier post you were going on about raking up $$ for a lawyer so you could just get the D over and done with? Use that money towards a better use - get therapy... you really need to start believing in yourself and loving yourself.
May it be eternal while it lasts.
My sitch
Me: 36
H:34
M: 5 years
Bomb: 03/14/06
