Quote:

What do *you* want? Do you just want him back or do you want to be a happy, fulfilled person, with or without him?



I want both!
I just want him back . . . I want him to help me get through this mess with Kiya . .
and I want to be a better person . . . but I'd like to just do it. I don't want my D to be the start of my new life.
It was a HUGE wake up . . . and Thank God . . . it brought me to you all!
But I'd like to keep my marriage . . and grow as a person . . and hopefully watch my H grow into a wonderful man.

I really do have faith . . somewhere under all this mess there's a wonder man hiding. I just know it.
He's been a REAL a$$hole . . . and I hate all the things he has done . .
but I do believe he could change.
MAYBE . . BUT only if HE REALLY wants to.

I don't want to run right back into the same sitch . . but I want to be as supportive of him as I possibly can.
If he wants the chance to prove it can be different (he asked for it lastnight) . . I'd like to give it to him.
Along with a good swift kick in the crotch mind you.
But I'll get over that.
I have to be forgiving.
I feel I have to try.

I'm going to try to avoid the Kevin Merry-Go-Round . . and just wait patiently while he builds his new job . . gets rid of OW . . . and gets his head straight.

Does that sound about right?