Listen to superstressed, she has given some good advice. Each and every one of us goes through the times where we hate our spouses.
The pity train will finally stop and let you off. It takes time. The amount of time it takes is your decision. You can get off anytime you want. There will be times after you get off that you take a short trip on it again. Your life is changing and it is going to get away from you. You need to catch it and enjoy it.
When my H first left I was a total wreck also. There was no OW but I thought there was. I even told him if he thought that is what he wanted to go for it. I gave him permission to cheat. I just wanted him to do whatever it took to want to come home. I got so sick I stayed in bed for one whole week. Only time I got out was to use the bathroom, brush my teeth and shower. I didn't even get up to eat. I didn't eat anything. If I did, I got sick. My kids had to do everything for me. I had to have my parents take them to school and pick them up because I couldn't face the world. You feel like everyone is against you. I ended up getting so sick that I had to go to the doctor and they put me on medicine to help me eat again.
Once I started getting up and going out again, I had such a hard time getting over the crying that I had to start carrying bags in the car with me. I never knew when I would get upset and everytime I did, I threw up. I got to the point when I wouldn't eat because I was afraid of getting sick.
Each of us has ways of dealing with things and you getting angry is your way. You need ot learn to deal with the anger. I see a very smart, strong woman in you and you can do anything you set your mind to.
Every post on here from you usually mentions your H and OW. Try to post positive things on here and you will be surprised at how often you talk about other things than your H. Look at Amy's thread. Half the time we are playing trivia quizzes instead of talking of our problems. It really helps.
As for you calling your H and telling him about your daughter. I don't see anything wrong with that. I would have done the same thing. You H hasn't called and he is being selfish. You can't do anything about that. Let him miss out on his kids. As your girls grow up they will remember you were the one who took care of them and not him.
Your mother is being selfish too. I know she thinks she knows whats best for you but she doesn't. It is the anger in her coming out. She is angry your H is putting you through this and her way of getting back at him is for you to not talk to him and to take the kids away from him.
You do what is right for you and the kids. Try to go a day without thinking about anyone but you and the girls. Try to post some good things on your thread. Write about some fun things you do with your girls. Reading about you dancing around with them is wonderful.
It is time for Emily to live life again. So, lets everyone give 3 cheers to Emily!!!
You can do this. If not, I am sending Amy after you.
