Muddle, I agree with you, I really DO think she believes it. I know 99% of the day she understands how I MUST be changed to have lasted this long. My "old" self would have either self-destructed or destroyed the R long before this.
I actually pointed this out to her when I got defensive in our convo. I told her that there was no way she could think I had not changed since I had just "let" her (her words, not mine) go out for 3-4 months, two or three times a week, with another man and managed not to be a total a$$ about it. How the HELL can you not see that. Do you think that was in any way easy for me? Don't you get how impossible that would have been for me without dramatic change?
I know I should not have SAID all that but like I said, it was a long, emotional convo to be sure. I do NOT feel wrong about speaking my mind, just the specific words I used.
